Pre-season football sucks

Last night I went to the final pre-season game between the Cleveland Browns and Chicago Bears. Let me tell you, I love spending full price for glorified practices in which the starters play for about 5 total minutes. It doesn't help that the Browns looked especially horrible and got waxed by the powerhouse that is the Chicago Bears (sw - sarcasm warning).

I did take an awesome picture of these two butch dyke lesbians that were sitting 6 rows ahead of me.....


I'm really confused as to which is the man and which is the women in this relationship. Normally, the short hair would indicated the "man" and the long hair would imply the "women" of the relationship. But as you will note in the above picture, the long hair is fashioned in a Mullet which is predominately found in the southern states. Mullet - Business up front, party in the rear = the best hairstyle name ever.

This hair style confuses the entire situation. Basically we have two lesbians acting like "men". So instead of a lesbian couple we have a homosexual (not that there's anything wrong with it) relationship. This causes a further conundrum as you might recall from basic math, two negatives equal a positive. First we assign a positive sign (+) to a straight couple and a negative sign (-) to a same gender couple. Next we assign a positive sign (+) to a same gender couple in which you have a "man" and a "woman", and a negative sign (-) to as same gender couple in which we have 2 "men" or 2 "women". (Stay with me here)

So basically we have a same gender couple with two "men". This can be expressed by the following formula (based on the givens above).

(-) x (-) = +

So the equation results in a straight couple. Meh, whatever the picture was worth the beating that the Browns took.